"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?" -Chris Rock

Riding my bike the mile and a half to campus from my house has been much more enjoyable than I initially thought it was going to be. It's so refreshing to ride all the way to campus in the cool mornings.

Though, right now, I'm waiting on the rain to stop so I can ride home.

my "Midas touch"

I just might have a gift like King Midas of Greek mythology. Only in reverse.

So, my car's timing belt died earlier this week and I'm driving my parents car.

Last night, I go to pull away from Cool Beans, and I find my tire's flat. Not just one nail, mind you, I'm too good for that. But a nail and a screw are both imbeded into the tire.

So, the moral of the story: don't let me touch your car.

my favorite quote of the summer:

"That's how I like my homeless people--unarmed and happy." and "Let me move the car so we don't get shot." -Eric

not the best choice in careers...

Maybe it's just me, but if I were a Japanese fisherman, I would want to have a change of career quickly.

In 2001, the USS Greenville collided with a Japanese fishing-training vessel off the coast of Oahu. This was a ship that was used to train new recruits about fishing. During the incident, several crewmen died, including several high-school students who were studying to become fishermen.

Today, a Japanese fishing ship with several crew memebers aboard became involved with an incident involving a Russian patrol boat. The two vessels were off the northern tip of Hokkiado, in a group of islands that are administered by Russia. The Russian patrol boat shot a warning shot across the bow of the Japanese fishing boat. Now, talk about a bad day, one of the crewmen was rushing forward on the fishing boat to recover equipment when the warning shot hit the crewman in the head, killing him instantly. Now, Russia and Japan are arguing about who is at fault for the incident.

Needless to say, it's not a good time to be a fisherman from Japan

Yesterday

I woke uo at 9AM, and got my things in order.

I left the house at 1:30PM, and headed to the bank.

I left the bank at 3PM, and started to drive to Columbia.

My car died at 4:15PM, leaving my stranded on the side of the road for the next 3 hours.

After trying to repair my car, then transferring my things to a different car, I finally got moving at 8:30PM, and arrived in Columbia about an hour later.

Needless to say, I went straight to bed after unpacking.

You might be from LA if...

You're driving on the 101 and see a clear cut definition of where the smog begins and ends.

You're sitting in traffic for at least an hour at any given part of the day.

You go to the beach and see that real lifeguards actually do look like the lifeguards from Baywatch.

You eat a different ethnic food for every meal.

You look around at the nice cars around you during traffic, thinking it'll be your favorite Laker or WB star.

You make a conscious choice to watch Jay Leno over David Letterman.

You know it's best not to be on the 405 at 4:05 pm.

Getting anywhere from point A to point B, no matter what the distance, takes "about twenty minutes". You begin to "lie" to your friends about where you are (i.e. "Yeah I'm like 20 minutes away") when you know that it'll take you at least an hour to get there).

You know what neighborhood someone lives in by the degree of damage incurred during the riots.

You've inadvertently learned Spanish.

You've got to bring the plants in when it drops to 55 degrees.

In the "winter", you can go swimming at the beach and ski in the mountains on the same day.

You've bumped into a celebrity at El Pollo Loco.

You know what "sigalert", "PCH", and "the five" mean.

If your destination is more than 5 minutes away on foot, you're definitely driving.

You have a gym membership because it's mandatory.

Your TV show is interrupted by a police chase.

You can't fall asleep without the lull of a helicopter flying overhead.

You've partied in Tijuana at least once.

You know Hollywood has a "lake".

You don't stop at a STOP sign, you do a California Roll.

You've lost your car in the Century City Shopping Center parking lot.

You think that Venice is a beach.

You drive next to a Rolls Royce and don't notice.

You've started crossing a street and returned to the curb when the DON'T WALK sign started flashing.

You've never listened to NPR.

Calling your neighbors requires knowing their area code.

You have a favorite Thai restaurant.

You think Johnny Rocket's is an accurate depiction of a diner.

You think Manhattan is a beach.

You eat pineapple on pizza.

You've been to Disneyland more times than Downtown.

When giving directions, you follow up with the phrase: "With/Without traffic."

You classify new people you meet by their Area Code. An "818" would never date a "562" and anyone from "323" or "213" is ghetto/second class. Best area code: "310."

Driving along, you see a high-speed police chase approaching in your rear view mirror. You don't panic or even flinch. Instead, you call your friends on your car phone and tell them you're on TV.

You know that if you drive two miles in any direction you will find a McDonald's or a Starbucks.

You never, ever go into the water at the Beach. You barely touch the sand.

It is not unusual for your waitress at a restaurant to have blue streaked hair, a dragon tattoo and tounge piercing.

You are awakened in the middle of the night by a moderate earthquake. Your reply: "That ain't even a 5-pointer" and go back to sleep.

You think you are better than the people who live "Over the Hill". It don't matter which side of the hill you are currently residing, you are just better than them, for whatever reason.

You live 10 miles from work. It takes you 60 minutes to get home.

You have to yell at your bank teller through a 2 inch thick wall of plexi-glass.

That last one goes for your local convienience store man, too.

You go to Las Vegas for a weekend getaway and the whole trip cost you $50.

You personally know at least 3 people who have been in a movie or TV show.

You know what In N Out is and feel bad for all the other states because they don't have any.

You've gotten parking tickets from parking in the red zone in front of your house.

You say you live in LA when really you live in a subsection of a subsection of a subsection of southern LA.

A movie star is picking out the best portobello mushrooms next to you at the grocers and you don't notice.

The guy at 8:30 in the morning at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

Any invitation comes with, "Starts at 8pm or as soon as you can get through traffic."

You have never met a waiter that wasn't really an "Actor."

It's sprinkling and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH '06"

You call 911 and they put you on hold.

The three hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn't caused by a horrific 9 car pile-up, but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe lying on the shoulder.

My strange body

After working out last night, I went to bed. Three and a half hours later, at 5:30a, my eyes snapped open and I was wide awake. All without any alarms or external stimulation. So I made breakfast, balanced my checkbook, and went to work an hour and a half early at 7:30a.

The wierd thing? After three and a half hours of sleep and working for eight hours, I feel more alert than I have in the past week.

And for the record, the "family size" label on a product doesn't mean anything: I just ate an entire "family size" lasagna. By myself.

My accomplishment of the day

I ate an entire casserole. By myself.

Oral surgery

I hate going to the dentist, and that's when I'm conscious during the inspection. I really was dreading the surgery, but I'm alright now-just short three teeth.